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发表于 2016-7-10 19:43:43
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3. Do a reality check.
3. 检验实际影响。
Now that you've gotten some distance and perspective, revisit your blunder
with the other people who witnessed it. Find out how much damage has been done
by putting your inquiry in the form of a question, like:
冷静下来仔细思考后,你需要回访一下看见你犯错的人。问一些问题,找出自己的错误到底造成了多大伤害,比如:
"John, when I reacted negatively to your idea earlier today, I think I
might have been overly harsh. I want to make certain you know that I'm not
trying to be a pill and that my heart is in the right place."
“约翰,今天我对你的想法反应很消极,也许我过分了一点。我想确定你了解我不是要反对,而且我是出于好心。”
Reality checks are best delivered via email rather than in person, because
email gives everyone the opportunity to cool down.
回访最好通过邮件而不是面对面进行,因为邮件给了每个人冷静的机会。
4. Apologize and address the blowback.
4. 道歉并处理后续问题。
The response that you get from your reality check in the previous step lets
you gauge what you'll need to do to get beyond the mistake. For example, if the
response is something like "You screwed up badly, you jerk," some groveling may
be in order.
根据从他人那得到的反馈,你就可以知道自己应该如何做才能弥补。如果你得到的回应是“你搞砸了,混蛋”,也许你就该低头认错了。
On the other hand, if the response is more like "Yeah, I was
offended/angry/surprised, but it's no big deal," your apology can be more
perfunctory:
但是如果回应是“对啊,当时我感觉被冒犯了/很生气/很吃惊,但是没什么大不了的,”你的道歉就可以相对草率一点:
"John, I'm really sorry that I overreacted and would like to meet with you
to apologize in person and make a commitment to never allow myself to act that
way in the future."
“约翰,我非常抱歉自己反应过度了,我想当面和你道个歉并保证自己再不会这样了。”
Shortcut: When you've screwed up
速成方法:当你搞砸了
• DON'T try to fix things immediately; take some time to think.
• 不要马上弥补;先思考。
• REMEMBER that eventually nobody will care what happened.
• 记住最后可能没人关心发生了什么。
• FIND out how seriously you screwed up.
• 找出你犯的错到底有多严重。
• MAKE apologies but focus on fixing the results.
• 道歉但是着重弥补结果。
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