拒绝悲观与消极 做一个正面思考者

英语自学网

　　Positive thinking is a significant element of happiness. In order to become a positive thinker, determination and consistency are important. The first thing to know about positive thinking is that everyone can do it. With certain cognitive and behavioral modifications, we can all become positive thinkers. Another important factor is that being a positive thinker does not mean you become numb to anything that is not working properly in your life or is negative -- it just means that you approach life and face challenges with a healthier outlook.
        　　正面思考是幸福的重要组成部分。要想成为一个积极的思考者，决心和毅力必不可少。首先你要知道，每个人都能成为积极思考者。只要改善一定的认知和行为，我们都可以做到。另外一个很重要的因素就是：你不需要对那些不是很完美的事情麻木不仁或是带有悲观的色彩——只是说人生和挑战你都要积极的对待。
        　　To become a positive thinker, these may help you:
        　　要想成为一个积极的思考者，下面这些也许能帮到你：
        　　1. Change your self-monitoring:
        　　改变自我监督
        　　Instead of selectively attending to negative events, focus on the positive ones. Then pay attention to the delayed consequences of your behavior rather than the immediate ones. For example, if a job is not going like you want, focus on the fact that you have a job and how you can take your time to make the situation better.
        　　与其选择做那些消极的事情，不如集中做些积极的吧。然后看看你的行为之后的效果。不是立竿见影的那种。比如，如果工作不是很喜欢，就记住你有一份工作的事实，专注如何能把情况变得好点。
        　　2. Change your self-evaluation:
        　　改变自我评价：
        　　Challenge any inaccurate internal attributions and see if you compare your behavior to standards that are excessively rigid and perfectionistic. If so, change these and be reasonable with your comparisons. For example, if you constantly compare your weaknesses with other peoples' strengths, then switch this and compare yourself with those who are doing poorer than you as well. Overall, people who focus more on their strengths than their weaknesses but at the same time are aware of their weaknesses have a healthier self-evaluation result.
        　　探究那些内部失败的原因，看看自己的行为是否是没有达到严格完美的标准。如果是，就改掉那些标准，接受自己目前的不足。比如如果你总是把自己的缺点和别人的优点作比较，那么换一下，也和那些做的没有你好的人比一比吧。一般来说，人们都会更关注他们的强项而非弱点，但同时他们也会意识到缺点会有更健康的自我评价结果。
        　　3. Change your self-reinforcement:
        　　改变自我奖励机制：
        　　If you have low rates of self-reward and high rates of self-punishment when it comes to certain aspects of your life, then you want to modify this. For example, think more of how far you've come, how hard you've worked, acknowledge yourself for it and then see how much further you want to go.
        　　如果你对自己奖励很少惩罚很多，而这似乎已成为一种惯性时，是时候改变一下了。比如，多想想你已经达到哪些成就，多么努力地工作，奖励一下自己，然后看看你还能走多远。
        　　4. Draw conclusions with evidence:
        　　根据事实得出结论：
        　　Look at the evidence, look at the events, look at patterns and don't base your conclusions on assumptions. For example, don't just assume someone will cheat you because they look like or in some ways act like an ex you didn't get along with. Look at other elements to see if there is any evidence for your assumption.
        　　根据事实得出结论：看看事实，看看事件，看看形式，千万别把结论基于猜想上。比如，不要因为某些人看起来像在骗你或是表现的让你觉得不怎么舒服，就认为他们的确在骗你。看看有没有其他证据能证实你的观点吧。
            
            

enfive

        　　5. Don't:
        　　别把事情过分个人化：
        　　The majority of how people interact with you is due to their own personality, strengths, and baggage and does not have as much to do with you. Pay attention to how to differentiate between different interaction signals. For example, instead of immediately getting frustrated because the waitress was a little late attending to you, think that maybe she is having a really tough day or too may tables to take care of.
        　　大部分时候人们如何和你交往都取决于他们的个性、能力和精神状态，和你其实没多大关系。注意如何区分不同的交际信号。比如，与其为迟来的服务生感到生气，不如换位思考，想想他今天心情不好，或者实在是太忙了吧。
        　　6. Don't do "either/or" thinking:
        　　别做选择题
        　　Black and white thinking based on perfectionistic thought is counterproductive. Every time a thought pops up and has words like "should" or "must," challenge it. For example, instead of saying "this should be done this way," say something like, "I prefer it this way but I am sure there are other ways to do and am willing to be open.
        　　基于完美的非黑即白想法反而会让你达不到预期的效果。每次出来一个想法，有着类似于“应该”“必须”这样的字眼，那么不妨改变一下吧。比如与其说“应该这么去完成”，不如说“我喜欢这个方法，但是我觉得肯定会有更好的方法能达到我们预期的效果。”
        　　7. Don't do emotional reasoning:
        　　不要太情绪化
        　　This is a belief based on feeling alone without any rational thinking behind it. For example, you don't like such and such but you don't have any logical reason for not liking them.
        　　冲动是魔鬼，这句话的确是是真理。例如，你总是没来由的不喜欢一些东西。
        　　8. Challenge your "what if" thoughts:
        　　改变那些“假使......”的想法：
        　　When faced with too much fear about a situation, imagine the worst case scenario and visualize a solution for it, then let go of fear. This way, you will be prepared for anything and your fear would not block you from being open and creative to different solutions. For example, if you are constantly worried about losing your job up to a point where it is creating a lot of anxiety and fear and is effecting your performance and your happiness negatively, then think of losing your job, visualize how you will handle it, find solutions in your mind and then let go of the thought and the fear attached to it.
        　　遇到太多的恐慌，想想最糟糕的的情况吧，设想一下那样的场景，然后把恐惧丢到脑后。这样你就算是做足了准备，恐惧感也不会再阻碍到你对于不同情景的创造力。例如，如果你总是担心失业，十分的焦虑和害怕，甚至影响到了你的表现和幸福，那么就想想如果你真的失业了，你会如何处理，自己想一想解决方案，然后就果断抛弃这些消极的想法和恐惧吧。
        　　At the end, positive thinkers are better problem solvers and have better interactions. In addition to that, people who are positive thinkers are happier and more satisfied with their life.
        　　最后，积极思考者都更善于解决问题，更好的与人交际。除此之外，那些积极思考者会更开心更知足。