趣味双语：第一次约会女生都在想什么？

英语自学网

恋爱指南：第一次约会女生都在想什么？
Have you ever been out on a date with a woman and gotten the feeling she's not listening to anything you're saying? Trust me, she's trying very hard to focus on the words coming out of your mouth. However she's much more preoccupied by all the thoughts running through her head. She's ten steps ahead of you and will most likely spend the entire date trying to predict the answers to the following questions.
你有没有试过和女孩子出去约会，却发现她似乎没有在听你说话？相信我她其实有很努力的让自己专心听你说话。但是她脑子里的思绪让她实在不得不分心。其实她比你想得远多了，整场约会中她都会想得到以下几个问题的答案：
Who will pay the bill?
一会儿谁来买单
Women start stressing about this as soon as you both sit down at the table. Will you be offended if she doesn't offer to pay or will you be offended if she does do the slow-motion "let me get my wallet" move? Put her fears to rest by telling her to order anything she wants because this meal is on you.
从你俩一坐下，女人就开始紧张兮兮的了。如果她不付帐的话，你会不会不高兴？如果她"掏钱包"的动作做慢了你会不会不爽？别让她紧张兮兮的了，直接告诉她点自己喜欢吃的东西吧，因为这一餐你买单。
What happens next?
吃完饭去做什么
Everything is going super great on the date. However, she's debating if you expect to come home with her or if you think she's a giant slut for even thinking that. Make your intentions clear from the outset by subtly sliding a handful of condoms across the table and mouthing "later."
这场约会一切都进行得如此完美。然而她脑子里却在就接你会不会想和她回家？或者如果知道她在想这些会不会觉得她是色女一枚？这个时候你就需要运用合适的行为动作来暗示她一会儿要去干什么了。
Do I actually like him?
我到底喜不喜欢他
You're funny, charming, and good-looking in the candle light. She's trying to decide if she wants to date you. Solve this problem by making her fall in love with you immediately. Instant love can generally be created by making sure she has endless drink refills.
约会的烛光下，帅气的你表现得既幽默又迷人。她心里在想的是以后要不要和你继续交往。让她放下这个疑虑的最好方法就是让她立马爱上你。她看没看上你？看看她是不是猛灌自己酒就知道啦。
Am I making sense?
我在说什么
As she rambles on about co-worker drama and its relationship to problems with her mother, she's simultaneously asking herself what the fuck she is talking about. She wants to make a good impression — and in an attempt to do so continually finds herself telling stories with no end. Save her the embarrassment by constantly interrupting with your own semi-related stories.
当她在和你狂侃海谈自己同事和老妈关系的时候，她自己心里肯定在臭骂自己我到底在跟他说什么呀。她想给你留下一个好印象，却发现自己说起话来没完没了。这个时候你就该用你的糗事来给她解围喽。
            
            

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What is he looking for?
他找的是女朋友还是一夜情
Whether you went on this date looking for a girlfriend or looking for a one-night stand, you know exactly what you want. Now she's attempting to interpret what you want by over analyzing everything you say. Stop making her read between the lines by spelling it out for her — "my friends dared my $100 to ask you on a date, after this I will never see you again."
不管你和她约会的目的是真心找女朋友还是只想一夜情，你对自己的目的相当清楚。而她则要通过你的言行举止来分析你此次约会的目的到底是什么。不要让她从你的言行举止中得出"我朋友跟我打赌100美元你会跟我约会，这次之后我们就不要见面了"的结论。
What will my friends think?
和他谈恋爱朋友们会怎么看
Women get off on judging each other, especially their very own friends. Even if she is falling madly in love with you, she's still thinking about what her friends will say. Assure her that her friends will love you by being extra-good-looking, extra-funny, extra-nice, and extra-rich.
女人天性喜欢品论别人，特别是评论自己的好朋友。不论她爱你爱得有多深，她还是会考虑自己闺蜜们对你们这段感情怎么看。用你超迷人的外表，超强的幽默感，超绅士的举止和非一般的财力告诉她，她的朋友们会喜欢你的。
Do I still look okay?
我看起来还好吧
She left her house with perfectly straight hair and smudge-free make-up. However you're now halfway done with your ribs dinner and she's stressing about what's in her teeth and how to get that lump of sauce out of her hair without you noticing. Make her feel more comfortable by smearing sauce all over yourself to the point that you're asked to leave the restaurant for indecent behavior.
她出门的时候把头发梳得倍直垂顺，打扮干净清新。但是你们的排骨餐吃到一半，她肯定在纠结牙齿里卡进去的东西，怎么在你不注意的情况下把不小心弄到头发上的小残渣弄掉。这个时候你就可以多弄点食物残渣到自己身上，然后说要去洗手间整理仪容来帮她结尾。