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Modern Marriage in American
The wedding of the 20th century, in 1981, celebrated a marriage that turned
out to be a hugebust. It ended as badly as a relationship can: scandal, divorce
and, ultimately, death andworldwide weeping.
So when the firstborn son of that union, Britain'sPrince William, set in
motion the wedding of this century by getting engaged to CatherineMiddleton, he
did things a little differently. He picked someone older than he is (by six
months), who went to the same university he did and whom he'd dated for a long
time. Although she isnot of royal blood, she stands to become the first English
Queen with a university degree, so inone fundamental way, theirs is a union of
equals. In that regard, the new couple reflect thechanges in the shape and
nature of marriage that have been rippling throughout the Westernworld for the
past few decades.
In fact, statistically speaking, a young man of William's age — if not his
royal English heritage— might be just as likely not to get married, yet. In
1960, the year before Princess Diana, William's mother, was born, nearly 70% of
American adults were married; now only about halfare. Eight times as many
children are born out of wedlock. Back then, two-thirds of 20-somethings were
married; in 2008 just 26% were. And college graduates are now far morelikely to
marry (64%) than those with no higher education (48%).
When an institution so central to human experience suddenly changes shape
in the space of ageneration or two, it's worth trying to figure out why. This
fall the Pew Research Center, inassociation with TIME, conducted a nationwide
poll exploring the contours of modernmarriage and the new American family,
posing questions about what people want and expectout of marriage and family
life, why they enter into committed relationships and what theygain from them.
What we found is that marriage, whatever its social, spiritual or
symbolicappeal, is in purely practical terms just not as necessary as it used to
be. Neither men norwomen need to be married to have sex or companionship or
professional success or respector even children — yet marriage remains revered
and desired.
And of all the transformations our family structures have undergone in the
past 50 years, perhaps the most profound is the marriage differential that has
opened between the rich andthe poor. In 1960 the median household income of
married adults was 12% higher than that ofsingle adults, after adjusting for
household size. By 2008 this gap had grown to 41%. In otherwords, the richer and
more educated you are, the more likely you are to marry, or to bemarried — or,
conversely, if you're married, you're more likely to be well off.
The question of why the wealth disparity between the married and the
unmarried has grownso much is related to other, broader issues about marriage:
whom it best serves, how itrelates to parenting and family life and how its
voluntary nature changes social structures.
The Marrying Kind
In 1978, when the divorce rate was much higher than it is today, a TIME
poll asked Americansif they thought marriage was becoming obsolete. Twenty-eight
percent did.
Since then, we've watched that famous royal marriage and the arrival of
Divorce Court. We'vetuned in to Family Ties (nuclear family with three kids) and
Modern Family (nuclear family withthree kids, plus gay uncles with an adopted
Vietnamese baby and a grandfather with aColombian second wife and dorky
stepchild). We've spent time with Will and Grace, whobickered like spouses but
weren't, and with the stars of Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica, whowere spouses,
bickered and then weren't anymore. We've seen some political marriagessurvive
unexpectedly (Bill and Hillary Clinton) and others unpredictably falter (Al and
TipperGore).
See pictures from the marriage of Al and Tipper Gore.
See the top 10 TV dads.
We've seen the rise of a $40 billion-plus wedding industry, flames fanned
by dating sites, andreality shows playing the soul-mate game — alongside the
rise of the prenup, the postnup and, most recently, divorce insurance. We care
about marriage so much that one of the fiercestpolitical and legal fights in
years is being waged over whom the state permits to get married. We've seen a
former head of state's child (Chelsea Clinton) marry after living with her
boyfriendand a potential head of state's child (Bristol Palin) have a child
before leaving home.
So, as we circle back around to witness another royal engagement, where are
we on themarriage question? Less wedded to it. The Pew survey reveals that
nearly 40% of us thinkmarriage is obsolete. This doesn't mean, though, that
we're pessimistic about the future ofthe American family; we have more faith in
the family than we do in the nation's educationsystem or its economy. We're just
more flexible about how family gets defined.
Even more surprising: overwhelmingly, Americans still venerate marriage
enough to want totry it. About 70% of us have been married at least once,
according to the 2010 Census. ThePew poll found that although 44% of Americans
under 30 believe marriage is heading forextinction, only 5% of those in that age
group do not want to get married. Sociologists notethat Americans have a rate of
marriage — and of remarriage — among the highest in theWestern world. (In
between is a divorce rate higher than that of most countries in the
EuropeanUnion.) We spill copious amounts of ink and spend copious amounts of
money being anxiousabout marriage, both collectively and individually. We view
the state of our families as asymbol of the state of our nation, and we treat
marriage as a personal project, something wework at and try to perfect. "Getting
married is a way to show family and friends that you have asuccessful personal
life," says Andrew Cherlin, a sociologist at Johns Hopkins University and
theauthor of The Marriage-Go-Round: The State of Marriage and the Family in
America Today. "It'slike the ultimate merit badge."
But if marriage is no longer obligatory or even — in certain cases —
helpful, then what is itfor? It's impossible to address that question without
first answering another: Who is marriagefor?
The New Marriage Gap
To begin to answer that question, it might be useful to take a look at the
brief but illustrativemarriage of golfer Greg Norman and tennis star Chris
Evert, who married in June 2008 anddivorced 15 months later. From all reports,
their union had many of the classic hallmarks ofmodern partnerships. The bride
and groom had roughly equal success in their careers. Beingwealthy, sporty and
blond, they had similar interests. She was older than he, and they'd hadother
relationships before. (She'd had two previous spouses and he one.) Plus, they'd
knowneach other a while, since Evert's newly minted ex-husband, Andy Mill, was
Norman's bestfriend.
Apart from the interest the union generated in the tabloids, this is
typical of the way manymarriages start. Modern brides and grooms tend to be
older and more similar. In particular, Americans are increasingly marrying
people who are on the same socioeconomic andeducational level. Fifty years ago,
doctors commonly proposed to nurses and businessmen totheir secretaries. Even 25
years ago, a professional golfer might marry, say, a flightattendant. Now
doctors tend to cleave unto other doctors, and executives hope to be part ofa
power couple.
The change is mostly a numbers game. Since more women than men have
graduated fromcollege for several decades, it's more likely than it used to be
that a male college graduate willmeet, fall in love with, wed and share the
salary of a woman with a degree. Women's advancesin education have roughly
paralleled the growth of the knowledge economy, so the slice of thefamily bacon
she brings home will be substantial.
Women's rising earning power doesn't affect simply who cooks that bacon,
although thereapportioning of household labor is a significant issue and means
married people need deftnegotiation skills. Well-off women don't need to stay in
a marriage that doesn't make themhappy; two-thirds of all divorces, it's
estimated, are initiated by wives. And not just the SandraBullock types who have
been treated shabbily and have many other fish on their line but alsoTipper Gore
types whose kids have left home and who don't necessarily expect to remarry
butare putting on their walking boots anyway.
考试题目
46. The 1978 TIME poll revealed that 28% thought of marriage as
obsolete.
47. The example of the marriage of golfer Greg Norman with tennis star
Chris Evert indicatesequal success in career is no guarantee of successful
marriage.
48. Though people still revered, neither men nor women see it as
prerequisite of sex, companionship, professional success, respect or
children.
49. The more money you have, the more education you have received，the more
likely you areto marry or to be married.
50. Two thirds of all divorces were estimated to have been initiated by
female because well-offwomen don't have to stay in wedlock if they didn't feel
happy.
51. The engagement of Britain，s prince William with Catherine Middleton was
different in thattheirs is a union of equals though she is not of royal
blood.
52. Prince William's mother was Princess Dianna.
53. In 1960 two thirds of 20-somethings was married.
54. The joint research by Pew Research center and TIME aimed at modem
American marriageand family.
55. The wealth disparity between the married and unmarried is related to
whom marriageseines.
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发表于 2017-12-8 20:19:02