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Yes this may be surprising, I was only 13 years old that time. But, don't
know how or why it happened to me so early. I fell deeply in love with a guy,
who I used to think was annoying 2 months ago.
It was 1997, in Chittagong, Bang- ladesh, me and my family have just moved
to a new apartment in a new area. So, after few weeks have passed, I started
going back to school, since it was during Ramadan we moved. Well, I made some
new friends in the neighborhood. This girl who was always hanging out with, her
name was Ivy.
One day when I was going to school, I bumped into Ivy on the way out of my
building, and she was standing next to this guy, he lived in the building right
beside mine. He said “Hi” to me, and we just asked each other “how are you” and
blah blah, then I had to leave. But I noticed that guy was looking at me. It was
a different kind of look, look with love in his eyes. Few days later, I noticed
whenever I go to school and come back from school, he is standing in his
balcony, and smiling at me. If he is not around, and one of his friends see me,
they start to yell out his name. Oh yeah, by the way, his name was Mamun.
So, I was very annoyed by those things. And I even told Ivy to tell Mamun
to stop these foolishness. After my exams were over, I had a break. So I used to
go to the roof and read books to spend my time. Mamun used to come to their roof
also and both roofs where so close to each other that you can just jump from one
to another.
Once I was reading a book, and I noticed Mamun come to their roof and he
looked at me, and smiled. OH MY GOD! I don't know what happened to me. That
sweet smile just took me away. I smiled back at him, for the first time. I could
never forget that moment. We used to smile at each other whenever we saw each
other, but never had a chat. I was sure that he liked me a lot, because, anytime
he would see me on the roof from his balcony, he came up to the roof right away.
I fell in love with him very deeply. I was surprised that I did. The feelings I
had was so beautiful and made me so happy.
Mamun did come to my roof one day to talk to me but I wanted him to go
away. I didn't want any one to see us talking. As you know, in Bangladesh rumors
go around so fast. When we talked, I saw deep love in his eyes. I always smiled
at him; I didn't talk to him much. Still, life was going on so wonderfully.
Mamun never told me he loved me. I thought that was because, I was 5/6 years
younger than him.
Very soon, I found out that me and my family are leaving Bang- ladesh and
coming to Canada. I was devas- tated. I cried all night but there was nothing to
do. When Mamun found out, he asked me on the roof, if it was true. When I said
yes, he asked how long will I be in Canada. The answer was maybe forever, we
were going to settle in Canada. He looked depressed, all he said was “Oh”, then
I told him out flight date.
The next month, it was Ramadan again. Mamun came to say good bye to me on
the roof, he was leaving to spend his Eid with his family. That day, I was so
sad, I felt like I lost something very important in my life. We said goodbye to
each other, he said he thinks I am such a sweet girl, he hopes I have a great
life in Canada. Oh my god, I couldn't hold myself, I think my eyes became
watery. I didn't want him to see that I was crying. I said “you too” and tried
to smile and left the roof right away.
That was the last day I ever saw my first love. Now 4 years later, here I
am in CANADA. I have guy in my life now, whom I am deeply love with after Mamun.
I never lose him.
I am ... over Mamun now. Everytime I remember those days, looking at each
other on the roof, talking, I feel really down. I wonder where he is now, if we
will even meet again... I can never forget my first love. |
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发表于 2016-7-10 11:36:55