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Kentucky Fried Chicken announced that it is going to advertise its new $3
lunches through customers’ nostrils. The company plans to send a fried chicken
scent throughout office buildings at lunchtime. The aroma will be dispensed from
the mail-cart that distributes interoffice mail throughout a building. KFC’s
president thinks it’s an idea whose time has come.
“That’s a terrible idea,” exclaimed Rose, a secretary for the Department of
Defense in Alexandria, Virginia. “First of all, I’m a vegetarian; the scent of
cooked meat appalls me. Secondly, I belong to PETA—People for the Ethical
Treatment of Animals. And we all know how terribly chickens are treated before
they are butchered. The whole idea is disgusting. And what makes it even worse
is that they plan to foul the air every workday with fried chicken odor. Once a
month would be bad enough, but once a day?”
A KFC spokesman said that KFC’s chickens are caged and butchered humanely,
and that the scent would be subtle, “like a woman’s perfume in a very big
elevator.” He said the scent would be just strong enough to notice. He also
noted that KFC has a vegetarian menu that includes tofu shaped like chicken
breasts and wings.
“Do they make the tofu crunchy and greasy, too?” asked Rose. “I’m going to
demand equal time—if office workers have to smell fried chicken every day, then
they should also have to listen to the sound of chickens’ heads getting chopped
off every day.” |
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