|
|
The mayor of Sacrapinto, J.K. Choi, 35, was charged with hit-and-run
driving last night by the town sheriff. A freshly killed calf was discovered
lying in the middle of Arlington Drive at about 10:00 p.m. A witness,
20-year-old Emily Parker, said she saw the car hit the calf and keep going. She
didn’t see the driver but she did recognize the hood ornament on the car—a pair
of bull horns.
“Oh, yes,” Emily said, “I know that’s the mayor’s car. It’s the only car in
town with bull horns on the hood.” Asked how she could see the bull horns at
night, she replied, “Oh, didn’t you know? A couple of months ago the mayor got
his horns neonized, so they have this soft purple glow at night. They’re really
cool-looking.”
The sheriff drove over to the mayor’s house, which is about five miles from
city hall, and found the mayor washing his 1972 Kadillac. He asked why the mayor
was washing his car so late at night. “Because that’s when there’s no hot sun
that causes the car to dry so fast that you have sun streaks. Don’t you know
anything, sheriff?”
The sheriff pointed out that one of the horns was broken at the tip. “When
did that happen?” he asked. “When did what happen?” Choi asked. “Oh, good grief!
I never even noticed that! Do you know how expensive these horns are? They don’t
grow on trees, you know. I wonder if I can find the missing piece and superglue
it back on.”
The sheriff then showed the mayor the tip of a bull horn. “Do you think
this is the missing piece?” The mayor was astounded. He looked at it, turned it
over in his hands, and then placed it on the horn, where it fit perfectly.
“That’s fantastic, sheriff! Thank you so much! Where did you find it?”
“Where did I find it? It was next to Farmer Brown’s calf that you killed
back there about an hour ago.” The mayor’s mouth dropped open. “Calf! What calf?
What are you talking about? I had no idea. I thought I hit a speed bump. What
was his calf doing out in the middle of the road in the middle of the night?
“We’ll settle this in court. I’m an innocent man. By the way, get that calf
over to Lester’s butcher shop right now. We’ll have us a big barbecue tomorrow
at city hall. And don’t forget to invite Farmer Brown. I know he’ll forgive me
after he tastes Lester’s world-famous rib eye.” |
|
发表于 2016-7-10 09:21:35