英语自学网 发表于 2016-7-10 16:19:30

高考英语作文范文:一个乞丐

  At a street corner squats a beggar. He is always there, under the tree, in
the shade. Senile as he is, he crouches in some ragged pieces of cloth. He is
there, always there, like a sculpture in the street. Day after day, thousands of
people pass in front of him hurriedly. Some spare coins, most give a quick
glance in disgust. However, it shocks me very much. What a miserable life a
human being can bear!
          At the first sight, you will be appalled that God has created such an
emaciated creature. His dark face is full of wrinkles, deep or shallow. They
remind people of the hardship the beggar has experienced. His cheeks are bony
while his neck is so thin. His hair is bedraggled like a nest, a nest with a
coat of oil. What an impressive sculpture it is! Most of the time, his mouth
speaks while his eyes are half closed. But once a pedes trian passes by, he will
keep nodding his head slightly and auto matically as if a gust of wind had
forced him to do so. At the same time, he raises his gnarled right hand from the
ground,murmuring to beg. What a hand! It is a seamy, shriveled hand. The
wrinkles in his skin are stretching, twisting and in tersecting. Dirt fills the
grooves. In front of him lies an dilapidated bowl with only a few coins in it.
Believe it or not, it is more and more difficult to make a living by begging.
Beside him, there is a stick as slim as his legs as if the third leg of the poor
old beggar.
          The sun is shining in the sky, but it doesn't shine every corner of the
world. There are still people who are not bathed in the sunshine. The beggar is
just one of them.
          简 评
          本文用生动的语言形象地刻画了一位在路边以乞讨为生的孤苦老人。作者非常注重细节的描写,如乞讨者布满皱纹、饱经风霜的脸,乱蓬蓬油腻的头发,半张半合的眼睛,粗糙的手,瘦弱的腿和脖子,他面前的破碗,破烂的衣服等。还包括乞讨者的动作,如向行人点头,伸手乞讨等。此外,作者还描述了行人厌恶的神色,进一步渲染了乞讨者艰难的处境,以唤起读者的共鸣。
          美中不足的是作者对乞讨者的描写没有遵循一定的顺序。描写文的写作一般要按一定的空间顺序组织,如:从上到下、从里到外、从远到近等,使文章显得更有条理。此外,在描写人物时,要抓住其最主要的特征,避免面面俱到。
          本文在语言表达上的一大特色是词汇丰富而准确。如
bony(cheeks),thin(neck),bedraggled(hair),gnarled(hand),stretching,twisting,intersecting(wrinkles),dilapidated(bowl)
等。作者还恰如其分地运用了一些修辞手法,特别是比喻,如His hair is bedraggled like a nest,a nest with a coat
Of oil;there is a stick as slim as his legs;he will keep nodding his head
slightly and auto matically as if a gust of wind had forced it to do so.
          >>更多写作请关注新东方网英语写作频道
        (兼职编辑:段保净)
页: [1]
查看完整版本: 高考英语作文范文:一个乞丐