新东方王楠楠:行文如“流水” 只是那“只言片语”
大家好,我是新东方听说读写拔高长线听说教师王楠楠,今天很高兴和大家来聊一聊关于一点写作的事情。通常来说,行文如流水,是用来形容文章写得很是通畅,如流水般润滑,如丝绸般光滑,也足以看出作者的才华。有时,文章中的只言片语,便可见作者的内心世界。但是,此处所谓的“流水”而非真正意义上的“行文如流水”,而是指很多学生写英文作文中常犯的写作错误,即“流水句”,英文表示为“run-on sentence“; 此处的“只言片语”也指的是一种写作错误, 即“片段”,英文表示为“fragment”,换言之,句子写得不完整,句子是残破不全的,要么意思上残缺,要么就是成分上残缺,总之,就是一句“破”句。那我们不妨分为两部分来看一下,先来看“流水句”Run-on Sentence
定义:
A run-on sentence is one that runs together two complete sentences/ clauses without a conjunction or punctuation.
具体的体现形式有两种:
1. Without any punctuation( 没有任何标点符号)
Tom decided to give up smoking he didn't want to die of lung cancer.
Smith was reading a newspaper Marry was listening to music.
2. With A Comma But Without Any Conjunction ( 两个独立完整的句子中间只有逗号,没有连词)
I missed the last bus, I had to take a taxi.
I was driving on the high way, I saw a terrible accident.
通常来说,有这样两种方式,怎么样来改动呢?
In general, there are three ways to correct a run-on sentence.
1) Period
A. B.
2) Comma and a conjunction
3) Semicolon-;
4) Period /semicolon +adv.
Remark: The Rule of Punctuation and Conjunction
To avoid a run-on sentence, please pay attention to the following rules:
a. Adverbial clause, main sentence.
b. Main sentences +adverbial clause.
c. The first sentence, co-ordinate conjunction + the second sentence.
d. The first sentence; the second sentence.
来看几个例子。
Examples:
When I was a ten-year-old child, the war broke out.
The war broke out when I was a ten-year-old child.
Yesterday I was ill, so I couldn't attend the party.
Yesterday I was ill; I couldn't attend the party.
不妨牛刀小试,做一下这些练习题
Practice:
Correct the following run-on sentences.
Nobody swam in the river that summer the water had been polluted.
1. Weather permits, we can have a picnic outside.
2. He left his hometown in sadness, he returned a highly respected hero.
3. Wherever you are you must keep it in your mind.
4. A poll suggested a number of people are using the Internet, they want to get information every day.
5. Transportation I now a very serious problem in the city, the local government is now considering taking some actions.
6. An increasing number of people are now planning to go abroad, they wish to develop themselves more in many respects.
7. Many people approve of part-time job, others oppose the idea.
8. All the candidates are considered, Tom is the best for the post.
9. We study English, they study physics.
了解了流水句,那么来看一下片段,什么是片段,如何来判断是否自己在写作的过程中,写出了一个片段出来,如果判断出来,又如何改正呢?为了回答这一系列的问题,我们不妨回归到本原,从定义开始入手。
Fragment
Fragment: a group of words without a subject/ verb
1. Dependent-word fragment (从句破句)
Example: After I arrived in Chicago. I went to bed at once.
我们大约可以看出来一个句号,必须是完整的句子,不缺成分。但是after 后面跟了从句,而没有主句, 所以是个错句。
Correcting way: to attach it to the sentence before/ after it.
After I arrived in Chicago, I went to bed at once.
如果简单了解了什么是片段,不妨来做个小练习,自我检查一下吧!
1) While I was shopping at the market yesterday ________________________.
2) Because the car broke down __________________
来看第二种形式:
"-ing" and " to" Fragment ( 分词或不定式造成的破句 )
Example: I spent two hours on the phone. Trying to find a garage to fix my car.
Correcting way:
1). To attach it to the sentence before/ after it.
2). To change it into a clause.
I spent two hours on the phone, trying to…
I spent two hours on the phone because I tried to find a garage to fix my car.
Practice: correct the following ing-fragment or to-fragment.
1) I couldn't catch the bus. As a result being late for the class.
2) Charlotte loved the movie Gone with the Wind, but Jane hated it. His chief objection being that is lasted four hours.
3) After the alarm rang, he lay in bed for ten minutes longer. Wishing that he had a lot of money.
4) I plan on working overnight. To get the job finished. Otherwise, my boss may get angry with me.
除此之外,还有一种学生在写文章总最爱犯得毛病,那就是用副词,或者介词短语来连接两个完整的句子,切记,副词和介词短语是不具备这个功能的。如下所示:
Added-Detail Fragment
This kind fragment often begins with the following words:
For example, also, except, such as including, especially…
Example: Many cold medicines don't work. Except aspirin.
The class often starts late. Yesterday, for example, at nine instead of eight
如何来改正呢?两种方法:
1). To attach it to a sentence.
2). To change it into a sentence
所以更改后的句子,可以这样来表达:
Many cold medicines don't work except aspirin.
The class often starts late. Yesterday, for example, it started at nine instead of eight.
通过上文中,对于这两种常犯的写作错误的大致介绍,相信大家对它们有个深刻的认识,在写文章的过程中,也应该竭力的去避免这样的错句出现,即使出现,也要懂得应敌之策。希望大家的英文写作能力可以“每天进步多一点,妈妈夸我小天才”。
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