最笨十大窃贼落网
他们四肢健全，却好吃懒做;他们自以为偷鸡摸狗后可以逃之夭夭，却不料自己把自己送进了警察局。他们是谁呢?他们就是“江湖”中最笨的十大窃贼，让我们一同来欣赏他们那令人啼笑皆非的落网“瞬间”.....。1. The Robber who tried to rob a bank that had already closed
A bank robber was arrested in Liberty, Pennsylvania, USA, after police said
he tried to rob a bank that had already closed for the afternoon. Christopher
Allen Koch, 28, arrived at Citizens & Northern Bank around 11:40 am and sat
inside his car in the bank’s parking lot for 20 minutes. But Koch had not read
the opening hours posted on the bank’s door, and the bank closed at noon. He
tried to enter the bank at 12:01 pm—a minute too late. He was wearing ski mask
and gloves and had a gun. Employees inside spotted Koch and got a license plate
number that led police to him. Koch was charged with criminal attempted robbery
and possessing instruments of a crime。
笨贼1：试图抢劫已经关门的银行
一名银行劫匪在美国宾夕法尼亚州的利伯蒂被逮捕，警方说此人试图抢劫一家当天下午不营业的银行。28岁的克里斯托弗·艾伦·科克在上午11:40左右开车来到国民北方银行的停车场，在车里坐了20分钟。但是科克没有看到银行门上张贴的营业时间，这家银行中午就停止营业了，他试图在下午12:01进入银行——
迟了一分钟，没能进去。他当时戴着滑雪面罩和手套，身上有一支枪。银行里的员工发现了科克，记下了他的车牌号，警方顺藤摸瓜将其逮捕。科克被控抢劫未遂和持有犯罪工具罪。
2. The Robber who decided to burglarize a house full of karate black
belts
Manizales, Colombia may not sound like a capital of karate, but the
Pan-American karate champion Cristian Garces happens to live there, along with
his instructors and fellow karate-peeps. So when a burglar decided to invade his
house in 2008 while every single one of Manizales most badass appendage
launchers was present, they sprung into action and beat the shit out of him
before he could scream “Auxilio!”
笨贼2：决定去空手道黑带高手云集的房屋的行窃
哥伦比亚的马尼萨莱斯听起来不像是空手道之都，但是泛美空手道冠军克里斯蒂安·加尔塞斯碰巧就住在那儿，与他同住那里的还有他的多名教练和同级别的空手道选手。2008年，一名窃贼决定到冠军家中行窃，当时马尼萨莱斯多数好勇斗狠的高手都在场，他们立刻投入战斗，没等窃贼来得及喊“救命”，就把他打了个半死。
3. The Robber who tried to fool police by playing dead at a funeral
home
A burglar broke into a funeral home in Burjassot, a small town just outside
Valencia and tried to fool police by playing dead, but two things gave him away.
First, he breathed. Second, he wore grungy clothes rather than the Sunday best
of those settling in for eternal rest。
Neighbors living nearby alerted police when they heard the front door of
the business being forced open in the middle of the night. Police officers
arrived with the owner, and eventually found the suspect lying on a table in a
glassed-in chamber used for viewings of deceased people during wakes。
笨贼3：试图在殡仪馆装死欺骗警察
一名窃贼闯入巴伦西亚附近小镇布里亚索特的一家殡仪馆，试图装死来欺骗警察，但是有两处破绽让他现形。第一，他还在呼吸。第二，他穿着脏兮兮的衣服，而不像准备永远安息的人们那样穿着最好的服装。
住在附近的邻居半夜听到殡仪馆的前门被强行撬开，就通知了警方。警察和殡仪馆的业主赶来，最后发现疑犯躺在一张桌子上的玻璃箱内，那是守灵时瞻仰死者用的。
4. The Robber who called to check if there was money in the cash register
before the crime
Police charged Daniel Glen, 40, with robbing a convenience store in
Windsor, Ontario, after he called ahead to ask the clerk how much money was in
the cash register before showing up. The clerk alerted police, who arrested Glen
nearby. Canwest News Service reported Glen was a suspect in two similar
incidents where the thief called ahead to make sure the clerk had the money
bagged and ready for him。
笨贼4：犯罪前打电话确认收银机里是否有钱
警方指控40岁的丹尼尔罪·格伦抢劫安大略温莎的一家便利店，他到犯罪现场之前先给店员打电话询问收银机里有多少钱。店员通知了警方，格伦在附近被逮捕。据加西新闻社报道，格伦也涉嫌两起类似的犯罪，在这两起案件中，窃贼都是提前打电话确认店员把钱给他放在包里，然后等他来取。
5. The Burglar who wrote his own name on the crime scene
An 18-year-old burglar who vandalized a children’s campsite building was
caught because he wrote his name on a wall at the scene. Peter Addison, of
Heaton Mersey, Stockport, and his friend Mark Ridgeway of Poynton, Cheshire,
smashed crockery and let off fire extinguishers. There are some pretty stupid
criminals around, but to leave your own name at the scene of the crime takes the
biscuit。
笨贼5：在犯罪现场写下自己的名字
一名破坏了儿童露营地建筑的18岁窃贼被捕，因为他在那里的墙上写下了自己的大名。彼得·艾迪生来自斯托克波特的希顿默西，他的朋友马克·里奇韦来自柴郡的伯顿，两人砸坏了营地的陶器，还把灭火器都打开了。总有一些罪犯非常愚蠢，但是在现场留下自己大名的可算是愚蠢透了。
6. The Robber who was defeated by a 95-year-old woman
Armed only with a screwdriver, a 95-year-old woman in a wheel chair kept a
burglar from breaking into her home by repeatedly stabbing his hand。
It was 3 a.m. when a 95-year-old Bartlesville woman heard somebody break
the glass on her front door and push the door open. When a hand came inside and
tried to unlock the door, she stabbed it. Again and again. The woman would not
leave the door for fear the man would break in while she was calling for help.
When police arrived, they found the bloody suspect passed out on the front porch
with dozens of stab wounds to his lower arms and hands。
笨贼6：被95岁的老妇人击败
一名坐在轮椅里的95岁妇女仅靠手中的一把螺丝起子，就把一个劫犯拒之门外，她不断用螺丝起子扎罪犯的手。
这个95岁的妇女住在巴特尔斯维尔，凌晨3点，她听到有人打破前门的玻璃，想要把门推开。当一只手伸进来试图开门锁时，她就用螺丝起子扎那只手。一次又一次不停地扎。这个妇女不敢离开门求助，生怕劫匪趁虚而入。当警方赶到时，发现血琳琳的嫌疑犯在前门入口处晕倒了，小臂和双手上有几十处伤口。
7. The Robber who tripped and stabbed himself with the very knives he was
stealing
A man running from a western Michigan store with stolen hunting knives
hidden in his pants tripped, fell and stabbed himself in the stomach. The man
had put about 300 US dollars worth of hunting knives in his waistband and tried
to leave the store, but Meijer employees confronted him and a scuffle followed,
he then fell and was stabbed by the knives he had hidden in his clothing。
The suspect was hospitalized after the attempted theft and is expected to
face a misdemeanor shoplifting charge, police say.
笨贼7：摔倒并被偷来的刀扎伤
一名男子从西密歇根的一家商店偷了几把猎刀藏在裤子里，逃跑时摔倒，被猎刀扎伤了肚子。此人在腰带里掖了价值大约300美元的几把猎刀，试图离开商店，但是梅耶尔商店的雇员拦住了他，之后双方开始动手，劫犯摔倒，被藏在衣服里的刀子扎伤。
8. The Robber who drove a stolen car to court
A 37-year-old man was charged with stealing a Lexus SUV after he drove it
to court the day a jury decided whether to convict him in an unrelated auto
theft charge。
Police were suspicious after watching the San Francisco hairstylist walk to
the car, parked in front of the courthouse, with keys in hand. The car also
attracted attention as it had several Yorkshire Terriers in it. The man was
charged with receiving a stolen vehicle, receiving stolen property and charges
of animal cruelty for leaving the dogs unattended in the vehicle. Meanwhile, the
jury convicted the man of the original auto theft charge。
笨贼8：驾驶偷来的车去法院
一名37岁的男子被控盗窃一辆雷克萨斯SUV，此前他驾驶这辆车去了一趟法院，而当天陪审团正要决定是否就一项与此无关的汽车盗窃指控给他判罪。
这个旧金山发型师手里拿着钥匙，走到停在法院前面的这辆车旁，警方见此就起了疑心。这辆车的引人之处还在于车子里有几只约克郡犬。此人被指控接收盗窃的汽车、盗窃财物以及虐待动物，因为他把狗留在车里不予照顾。与此同时，陪审团还就原先的盗车指控判他有罪。
9. The Burglar who stole, got drunk and got caught
A burglar who pinched a bottle of expensive champagne to celebrate after
stealing money and jewellery was caught after he parked his car to sleep it off.
Police were called out by worried passers-by who saw the 37-year-old man slumped
behind the wheel of a car at the side of the road in Dusseldorf, Germany。
Officers who woke him up checked his ID and found he was wanted for a
string of robberies. A police spokesman said: “The officers couldn’t believe
their luck when they found out who he was. He even had the stolen goods from his
latest robbery with him in the car. And we can also got him for drink driving as
well。”
笨贼9：盗窃，喝醉，然后被捕
一个窃贼偷到钱和珠宝后顺手“牵”来一瓶昂贵的香槟来庆祝，结果他停下车睡觉醒酒时被捕。在事发地德国杜塞尔多夫，焦虑的行人喊来警察，因为他们看到这个37岁的男子瘫坐在路边一辆车的车轮后面。
警察把他叫醒，查看了他的身份证，发现他正是因一系列抢劫遭到通缉的人。一个警方发言人说：“警官们发现他的身份时都不敢相信自己的运气。此人车里甚至还装着上次偷来的赃物。我们还可以控告他酒后驾车。”
10. The Robber who broke into the home of a sword-wielding Olympic fencing
ace
A burglar in Hungary climbed over a fence to rob a house only to be
confronted by a sword-wielding Olympic fencing ace. Virgine Ujlaky, 23, was
practicing her swordplay when she saw Pal Nagy, 43, clambering in through a
window of her house in a posh suburb of Budapest。
Within seconds and a few swift slashes of the sword the crook was pinned
against the wall, with the blade against his throat as the swordswoman reached
for the phone and called police. They arrested the villan 20 minutes later, who
had to be treated by paramedics for shock. Ujlaky said: “I wasn’t scared when I
saw him. It was good practice as I have a competition coming up this week。”
笨贼10：进入奥林匹克王牌击剑选手家里行窃
匈牙利的一个窃贼爬过一排篱笆，试图抢劫一户人家，没料到遇上一位王牌奥林匹克击剑选手正在练剑。23岁的维尔吉尼·乌伊洛基的家位于布达佩斯特漂亮的郊区，她正在练剑，忽然看到43岁的帕尔·纳吉从她家房子的窗户爬进来。
她快速挥舞了几下剑，几秒钟之后就把这个坏蛋逼到了墙根。她用剑抵着窃贼的喉咙，伸手拿过电话报了警。20分钟后警察逮捕了这个歹徒。而此人由于受到了惊吓，不得不接受医务人员的治疗。乌伊洛基说：“我看到他时一点都不害怕。我本周有个比赛，这可是一次很好的练习。”
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