趣味英语阅读
Keys? Kiss?A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adult who had
recently come to live in the United States. After placing quite a number of
everyday objects on a table, he asked various members of the class to give him
the ruler, the book, the pen and so on. The class went very smoothly and the
students seemed interested and serious about the work that they were engaged in
until when my friend turned to an Italian student and said, "Give me the keys."
The man looked surprised and somewhat at a loss. Seeing this, my friend thought
that the student hadn't heard him clearly, so he repeated. "Give me the keys."
The Italian shrugged his shoulders. Then, he threw his arms around the teacher's
neck and kissed him on both cheeks.
钥匙还是接吻
我的一位朋友在给一个成人学生班级上英语课。他们都是新近来美国生活的。在一张桌子上摆了许多日常用品之后，他请全班同学给他挑出尺子、书本、钢笔等。课进行得井然有序，学生们对自己所做的似乎很感兴趣，也很认真。后来轮到一名来自意大利的学生，我的朋友说：“给我钥匙。”那人看起来非常吃惊，也有点手足无措。看到这种情况，我的朋友想是他没有听清楚，于是又重复了一遍：“给我钥匙。”那位意大利学生耸了耸肩。接着，他伸出胳膊搂住老师的脖子在双颊上亲了两下。
Prepare Yourself
A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his
parents reading: "Mom - flunked all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare
Pop."
Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare
yourself."
自己做好准备
校园里流传着这样的故事：一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报，上面写着：“妈妈，我所有功课都不及格，被学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”
两天以后，他收到了回电：“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!”
Millionaire
CEO: "My wife made a millionaire out of me."
Assistant: "What were you before?"
CEO: "a multimillionaire."
百万富翁
主管：我妻子使我成为百万富翁。
助手：以前你是什么?
主管：千万富翁。
A Trip to Disney
On a trip to Disney World in Florida, my husband and I and our two children
devoted ourselves wholeheartedly to the wonders of this attraction. After three
exhausting days, we headed for home.
As we drove away, our son waved and said, "Good-bye, Mickey."
Our daughter waved and said, "Good-bye, Minnie."
My husband waved, rather weakly, and said, "Good-bye, Money."
迪士尼之族
弗罗里达州的迪士尼乐园是一个迷人的地方。一次我和丈夫以及两个孩子前往旅游，我们全身心地沉醉在它的各种奇观之中。精疲力竭地玩了三天之后，我们要回家了。
当我们驱车离开时，儿子挥手说：“再见，美奇。”
女儿挥着手说，“再见，美妮。”
丈夫也有气无力地挥了挥手，说道：“再见，美元。”
An Old Couple's Quarrel
A couple of codgers got into a quarrel and came before the local
magistrate. The loser, turning to his opponent in a combative frame of mind,
cried: "I'll law you to the Circuit Court."
"I'm willing," said the other.
"I'll law you to the Supreme Court."
"I'll be there."
"And I'll law the hell!"
"My attorney will be there," was the calm reply.
老夫妻吵架
一对性情乖僻的老夫妻发生了争吵，一直闹到地方法官那里。败诉的一方以一种临战的姿态冲着对方嚷道：“我要到巡回法庭去告你。”
“愿意奉陪。”另一个说。
“我要到最高法院去告你。”
“我也陪你。”
“我还要到地狱去告你。”
“我的代理人会奉陪的。”对方平静的说
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